Disclaimer

The author hereby refuses to accept responsibility for any liability - legal, mental or otherwise, incurred by any reader during or after encountering any of the material published in these pages. Any resemblance to any person or incident is surely intentional and pejorative to the fullest degree. In case you are offended by derogatory remarks, snide comments and subversive dialogues you are requested to ask yourself if the author would give a damn. The author hopes you grow an apple tree out of your left ear.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

For those about to rock! (I salute you.)

I couldnt help but stare at my friend in pure, unconcealed shock, after what he had to say about my music tastes. Its all crap, he said, no rhythm. Noise. Thats what he called it. Noise. Forgive him, oh Lord, for he does so in ignorance. I thought over it, wondering what could lead him to make such utterly horrifying comments. Lack of exposure? Maybe. What makes us listen to what we do? Franky speaking, 5 years ago, I hated heavy metal. When I finally started with Maiden, friends said I didnt 'look' the type who listens to all that. Whatever that means. Agreed, I may not exactly be the one to grow my hair shoulder length, and pierce my lips *yuck*. I cant see, though, why you have to look like a punk to enjoy such music, but thats beside the point. I generally find I am simply at a loss of words when it comes to why I do it. I mean, how can you say what it feels like when Mustaine lets it rip in 'The Four Horsemen'? Or, to be a bit more subtle, Slash in 'Sweet Child Of Mine'? Awesome stuff.

I have found all music freaks can be classified into the following categories:
1. The genuine rock-lovers: This category is for the people who generally enjoy the music, and know there is a lot more to it than getting loaded, or smashing up stuff.

2. The posers: The kind of people who make sure that everyone who knows them, knows they listen to 'hard rock'. Simbly cuz its 'cool'. Gimme a break.

3. The pop-lovers: No, I am not going to do a pop-bashing show here. I respect them for their choice, considering I was one of them, a few years back. There is nothing wrong in listening to what you like.

4. The rock-haters: This category I resent the most. The kind of people, who just cant see the beauty of such music, and assume everyone who listens to it is a poser. Bull. E.g. my afore mentioned friend. I cant help but feel a twinge of pity for such people, when they tell me Megadeth is a crappy band and how all Mustaine can do is scream. Take a hike.

Creativity, up in smoke

'Smoking in all form, on screen, should be banned'.

Well, excuse me while I sneeze,cuz I am allergic to bullshit. The proposed ban on smoking in films has to be the most stupid decision coming from the government in a long time. And thats saying a lot.

This very topic was being discussed, on a public talkshow in a news channel, the other day. No, I am not the one who watches the news and all. I am the type who searches for the remote the moment a news channel appears, lest my mum decides something too important to miss in coming on it. On this particular occasion, however, the remote was not to be found. Anyway.

I refuse to believe this act will do any good at all. Whether this refusal arises out of a lack of understanding, or the presence of common-sense, I do not know. It is very well known that SRK is a chain-smoker, in real life. Nothing can be done about it. I wonder, how much is a person going to be influenced by on-screen character of his 'idol', as opposed to his real life? One gentleman voiced his praise for the star, thus," SRK is a very considerate person. Though everyone knows he is a chain-smoker in real life, he takes care not to do it publically. He was one of the first to support the ban". If you havent been deprived of your share of brains, you ll see the absurdity of this statement.

1. The fact that everyone knows he is a chain-smoker kinda defeats the purpose of him trying hard not to do it publically, doesnt it?

2. Of course he supports the ban, dimwit. Though I am pretty sure this 'support' was a face saving act, more than an act of consideration towards his fan following.

'Smoking is bad', they say, 'and the actors doing it on-screen will influence young minds'. I suppose its news to you, that murder is bad, too. Inspite of that, our trigger-happy hero overcomes countless obstacles, one of those obstacles being the law, in his effort to save the inevitable 'Basanti'. The fact that he seems to endorse the Beretta, and less than merciful methods of execution, escapes all notice. We are worried only about the ocassional puff, and what influence it will have on our kids. If you banning smoking, ban murder on screen. And rape. And thefts. They are also illegal. All that would be left of a bollywood movie will be the cleavages and the short skirts. The 'item numbers'. Though, I suspect, that will be enough to keep the show running.

I, for one, believe than since we claim to be the worlds biggest democracy, we should remain just that. Everyone citizen should have the freedom to live their lives, to do what they want, with themselves. Restricting the creativity of cinema is hardly the answer. Mind you, I dont support the habit.

As one of the speakers in the show said,'We are barking up the wrong tree. A study once found that, contrary to popular belief, married men smoke more than bachelors. I take it the government will ban marriages next.' Well said, my friend.

Monday, December 11, 2006

Dancing in the Rain


Have you ever got the feeling that your knee cap is a good singer? Well, I have. I found out some 4 months ago. Its a funny story. It was in the month of July. The start of the rainy season. It had just begun to drizzle. Walking down the road , I felt this itch in my right leg. I looked down and there it was! My knee cap was in a world of its own, singing in a brilliant baritone. My chest swelled with pride. I didnt know it was possible. I saw dreams of how iI would become the talk of the town. I would earn money. No, mint it! Girls would flock around me to hear my knee cap sing. They would clap and laugh, amused. Oh, how I dreamt!

Suddenly, it stopped. I was shocked at first, and sad later. I pranced around, hoping that somehow it would start again. It didnt, just then. But something about that particular way I moved caused me to believe that it would go back to how it was. I didnt give up. I didnt want to. I pranced and danced for 3 hours with just hope to keep me going. I got stared at, laughed at. Made fun of. And after all that, I had the last laugh. There really is a rain dance.

(Note: This is a post written by me in another blog. Posted it here for lack of ideas.)